I thought I ordered a "massage wand." You know, the kind that's delivered in discreet packaging? Instead, I received an eight-foot-tall slime monster.
The listing said "Pulsating Relief" and "Satisfaction Guaranteed." Sounded good to me after a bottle of wine and another long night alone in my soap-making studio.
But what I got was a crate the size of a refrigerator and a shapeshifting slime who technically still matches the product description.
His name is Oz. He's been living in a cave for eighty years, he wrote the listing himself, and he put "no returns" in the fine print.
His body shifts. Adapts. Any shape, any pressure, any texture.
I should send him back.
Instead, I'm letting him help me save my business while his "deep-tissue technique" ruins me for anything battery-operated ever again.
But the longer he stays, the harder it is to keep him a secret.
To make matters worse, a mysterious creature has been haunting the town...
And Oz perfectly matches the suspect’s description.
Satisfied by the Slime is a standalone monster romance featuring a sweet slime hero, a heroine who hasn't been touched in years and is about to make up for lost time, and enough spice to set your kindle on fire. Guaranteed HEA!
For all orders exceeding a value of 100USD shipping is offered for free.
Returns will be accepted for up to 10 days of Customer’s receipt or tracking number on unworn items. You, as a Customer, are obliged to inform us via email before you return the item.
Otherwise, standard shipping charges apply. Check out our delivery Terms & Conditions for more details.
Returns will be accepted for up to 10 days of Customer’s receipt or tracking number on unworn items. You, as a Customer, are obliged to inform us via email before you return the item, only in the case of:
– Received the wrong item.
– Item arrived not as expected (ie. damaged packaging).
– Item had defects.
– Over delivery time.
– The shipper does not allow the goods to be inspected before payment.
The returned product(s) must be in the original packaging, safety wrapped, undamaged and unworn. This means that the item(s) must be safely packed in a carton box for protection during transport, possibly the same carton used to ship to you as a customer.
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